Studies and research vary of course but some research projects that 30 to 60% of all married individuals in the U.S. will engage in infidelity at some point during their marriage. This translates into nearly 80% of all American marriages being impacted by cheating at some point.

Being cheated on is not only a horribly awful feeling — it can completely destroy lives and relationships. Cheating and its consequences are one of the most devastating moments in a relationship. Cheating obviously hurts but what about serial cheating?

We’ve all heard it said, “Once a cheater, always a cheater.” but is it actually true? According to a study from the University of Denver, research suggests there is solid evidence that it is.

Although there is an established body of research addressing predictors of relationship infidelity, there are few, if any, that specifically address infidelity in a previous relationship as a risk factor for infidelity in a subsequent relationship. This study specifically addressed the risk of serial infidelity.

For the study from the University of Denver, which was published in the Archives of Sexual Behavior, researchers had nearly 500 people answer questions about at least two different romantic relationships. Of the participants, 44 percent reported having sex with someone outside of their current relationship during their study.

People who had cheated before were much more likely to be unfaithful. A lot more. Those who cheated in their first relationship were three times more likely to cheat again.

What about those who were cheated on? When people knew their partner was cheating in their first relationship, they were more than two times (2x) more likely to report infidelity in their second relationship than those who never experienced an unfaithful partner.

Interestingly enough, the study finding is also backed up by past research. A 2016 study found that among people who had cheated in previous relationships, 30 percent cheated on their current partners. That’s compared to only 13 percent of those who had never been unfaithful at all.

What About Cheater’s Remorse or Guilt?

Most, not all, cheaters feel guilty for cheating on their spouse or partner. In addition, they feel like they aren’t true to their own set of morals, even if their partner never finds out about their infidelity.

Some may feel like they can’t stop themselves, but they’re still tormented by their cheating and infidelity. Conscience can serve as an important brake on infidelity and be an important driver of learning from it. (By contrast, cheaters with more sociopathic traits won’t feel much guilt for their actions which means they are more likely to take advantage of the next opportunity for infidelity that presents itself.)

Many believe that the best predictor of future behavior is past behavior. (Note, the key word here is “predictor” which isn’t the same as a determinant.) Someone with a long history of infidelity, across multiple relationships, is more likely to repeat that past behavior. Either way, science strongly suggests the odds of being cheated on by a cheater are very high.

These predictors are just one of many reasons why marriages that start off as affairs fail. Statistically speaking, marriages that start off as affairs are only successful about 1% of the time.

Recovering from Infidelity

If you have experienced infidelity-induced trauma caused by the emotional and sexual betrayal of your spouse, there is hope! If you are a child affected by parental infidelity, there is hope! If you are a spouse who has betrayed the trust, love, and fidelity of your marriage, there is hope! We recommend that you seek support through professional counseling and therapy as well as through groups dedicated to supporting you through this traumatic journey to recovery. You are not alone and recovery and healing are possible!

Share Your Story

The CHADIE Foundation shares personal stories of spouses and children impacted by infidelity and affairs. If you have a story you would like to share and have published, please use the contact information below to share your story with The CHADIE Foundation. Our mission is to help educate everyone about the damage infidelity, affairs, and adultery cause families and how to minimize the impact.

About CHADIE Foundation

The CHADIE Foundation (Children are Harmed by Adultery, Divorce, Infidelity, and related Emotional trauma), helps spouses, partners, and children who have been negatively impacted by adultery, affairs, and infidelity. To learn more about CHADIE and how you can help, please email us at support@chadie.org or us at CHADIE.org.