Maddy had been married for over 20 years when she finally decided it was time for another affair. She had tried to play the part of a committed wife and mother but it just wasn’t her ‘truth.’ She had cheated before and she was bored now so she felt it was a good time to cheat again.

Maddy was going through her midlife crisis and another affair sounded like a good idea. She soon struck up an affair with a like-minded man, Willem. Willem was a middle-aged, bald, and stout man with a below-average personality. He had struggled in his marriage with his inability to relate to his wife and children. Willem felt his wife and children were ‘broken’ and that is why he couldn’t connect with them. He didn’t have time to connect with them because they were broken. (Willem was not very ‘bright’ and didn’t seem capable of making the connection that his 18-year-long addiction to pornography and illicit fantasies of infidelity and sexual escapades might have something to do with it.)

Maddy connected with Willem through a community group. They met to discuss ‘intellectual’ books and topics. Maddy felt like she was an intellectual and believed Willem to be one as well. They soon had sex and started their adulterous affair.

Months later, when Maddy and Willem were caught in their adultery, the excitement of their ‘intellectual’ (and illicit sexual) relationship soon faded. The problem was, that neither Maddy’s husband nor Willem’s wife wanted them back when they realized how far gone they were. Eventually, Maddy begged her way back to her husband by promising ‘reconciliation’ and introducing sex and intimacy back into their marriage.

One evening, Maddy, having a moment of conscience and clarity told her husband that she needed to apologize to Willem’s wife for having an adulterous affair with him. That moment of conscience and clarity soon left her and within days went back to Willem to continue the affair they had started.

Maddy’s husband divorced her and Willem’s wife divorced him. Two years after the start of their affair, Maddy and Willem still had plans to marry but couldn’t seem to set a date for one reason or another. Ironically, even after two years, Maddy still hadn’t apologized to Willem’s ex-wife or his children for her affair with him, for causing their divorce, and for the extensive damage, it had caused Willem’s children.

Recovering from Infidelity

If you have experienced infidelity-induced trauma caused by the emotional and sexual betrayal of your spouse, there is hope! If you are a child affected by parental infidelity, there is hope! If you are a spouse who has betrayed the trust, love, and fidelity of your marriage, there is hope! We recommend that you seek support through professional counseling and therapy as well as through groups dedicated to supporting you through this traumatic journey to recovery. You are not alone and recovery and healing are possible!

Share Your Story

The CHADIE Foundation shares personal stories of spouses and children impacted by infidelity and affairs. If you have a story you would like to share and have published, please use the contact information below to share your story with The CHADIE Foundation. Our mission is to help educate everyone about the damage infidelity, affairs, and adultery cause families and how to minimize the impact.

About the CHADIE Foundation

The CHADIE Foundation (Children are Harmed by Adultery, Divorce, Infidelity, and related Emotional trauma), helps spouses, partners, and children who adultery, affairs, and infidelity have negatively impacted. To learn more about CHADIE and how you can help, please email us at support@chadie.org or visit us at CHADIE.org.