(The following article is a contributed article obtained through an interview.)

A few months after my family learned about my affair and mistress, I moved out of our family home into a nearby apartment. While I put some effort into rectifying things with my wife and children, I didn’t try to work things out — I was just going through the motions. I was still shocked I had been caught.

My mistress was a very flirtatious and headstrong woman. She was married with children and looking for an exciting affair. What I didn’t expect was how mentally unstable she would become once our affair was discovered. (To be fair, our relationship was primarily sexual so I knew very little about her.)

While my wife pursued our divorce, I spent time with my mistress, the only exception being when I was working or had my children with me. My children reluctantly spent time with me one to two days a week.

One early October morning day, my mistress dropped by my apartment. She parked her car at a nearby park and walked to my place. She texted me that she was on her way. I reminded her that I had my children with me but she insisted on meeting. As such, I busied my children with video games and told them I had to run an errand but would be back soon. I stepped outside my apartment and met my mistress. We talked for 20–30 minutes outside of the apartment. My mistress was distraught and crying so I tried to calm her down. We talked and kissed and then she headed off to her son’s birthday brunch party. I headed back into my apartment and thought nothing of it.

A week later I found out that my children used our video doorbell to watch me with my mistress. They witnessed everything — my mistress crying, our arguing, and our kissing. My youngest son was most affected by this experience but all of my children were traumatized. Even years later, I can’t believe how stupid I was then and how my stupidity continues to hurt my children. I let my sexual infidelity drive my decisions and now my children live with the repercussions.

Recovering from Infidelity

If you have experienced infidelity-induced trauma caused by the emotional and sexual betrayal of your spouse, there is hope! If you are a child affected by parental infidelity, there is hope! If you are a spouse who has betrayed the trust, love, and fidelity of your marriage, there is hope! We recommend that you seek support through professional counseling and therapy as well as through groups dedicated to supporting you through this traumatic journey to recovery. You are not alone and recovery and healing are possible!

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The CHADIE Foundation shares personal stories of spouses and children impacted by infidelity and affairs. If you have a story you would like to share and have published, please use the contact information below to share your story with The CHADIE Foundation. Our mission is to help educate everyone about the damage infidelity, affairs, and adultery cause families and how to minimize the impact.

About the CHADIE Foundation

The CHADIE Foundation (Children are Harmed by Adultery, Divorce, Infidelity, and related Emotional trauma), helps spouses, partners, and children who adultery, affairs, and infidelity have negatively impacted. To learn more about CHADIE and how you can help, please email us at support@chadie.org or visit us at CHADIE.org.