(The following article is a contributed article.)

Dear Infidelity, you were everything I ever wanted and so much more! You were so vibrant, new, and exciting! Tantalizing even. I hungered and lusted after you. I mean, my marriage was so dull, mundane, and predictable in comparison to being with you, my perfect lover, my dear Infidelity. Our secret and exciting stolen moments meant the world to me. With you, I was always free and myself. I didn’t worry about my responsibilities, spouse, or children — because I had you. You were my one and only responsibility, love, and admiration. You made me whole. You completed me!

In fact, you were all I dreamed and thought about. You were always there. Even before I started our love affair, I could feel you pressing against my mind and heart. The older I got, the more you pressed and the more I yearned for you. You were always there in the deepest recesses of my heart. You gave me hope, but I gave you life and meaning when I finally embraced you. With you, and only you, I could be unfaithfully faithful.

We dreamed big and often together in our affair. We dreamed of being free from our failed marriages and lives. We dreamed of breaking free from all restraints and looked forward to all the possibilities of our affair turned marriage. We dreamed of building our lives together. We yearned for a better life — together. We wanted so much to be able to shout out and proclaim our undying love for each other. We pushed and pushed the boundaries of our infidelity until one day it was no longer our little secret. Everyone would be in awe of our infidelity. Our children would marvel at the beauty and majestic magnificence of what we had secretly built together through our infidelity.

However, it was — and could never be — enough. Our secret infidelity couldn’t remain hidden and locked away from our families and friends forever. We knew that one day our infidelity would be revealed and the inspiration of legendary love stories.

I was so enamored with you, me, and us! We would defy the odds and be together forever. It was you and me. All for one and one for all!

And then the unexpected happened. The world found out about us, but they didn’t understand you or me. They gasped and shuttered when they heard. They wept and cried for you and me. It was then that I realized what our infidelity had done to you and me. You and I were different once everyone knew about what our infidelity meant. We changed. The energy and excitement were somehow different. People looked at you differently than I did. They didn’t see your beauty and excitement the way I did. I defended you! I really did, but eventually, they didn’t look at me the same way either. They turned on me — and then eventually you turned on me too! You, my love, my dear Infidelity, betrayed me too! Why? Why did you forsake me?

I am nothing without you and you without me. Please, please, please, come back to me, Infidelity! Without you, I am lost in the ashes of my old life and new reality. The devastation is too great for me. Please, please, please rescue me!

Recovering from Infidelity

If you have experienced infidelity-induced trauma caused by the emotional and sexual betrayal of your spouse, there is hope! If you are a child affected by parental infidelity, there is hope! If you are a spouse who has betrayed the trust, love, and fidelity of your marriage, there is hope! We recommend that you seek support through professional counseling and therapy as well as through groups dedicated to supporting you through this traumatic journey. You are not alone and recovery and healing are possible!

Share Your Story

The CHADIE Foundation shares personal stories of spouses and children impacted by infidelity and affairs. If you have a story you would like to share and have published, please use the contact information below to share your story with The CHADIE Foundation. Our mission is to help educate everyone about the damage infidelity, affairs, and adultery cause families and how to minimize the impact.

About the CHADIE Foundation

The CHADIE Foundation (Children are Harmed by Adultery, Divorce, Infidelity, and related Emotional trauma), helps spouses, partners, and children who adultery, affairs, and infidelity have negatively impacted. To learn more about CHADIE and how you can help, please email us at support@chadie.org or visit us at CHADIE.org.